My mate Dave's dead keen on animals so, when he heard that the otter was making a comeback in the countryside, he decided straight away to track one down in the wild.
To everyone's surprise, Fiona's posh friend Natalie asked if she could go along too.
Apparently, when she was small an aunt had given her a video of 'Ring of Bright Water' for her birthday and she'd fallen in love with the 'cuddly' otter in the film.
Dave was feeling a bit off-colour on the day they'd chosen but they set off anyway and had only walked a few hundred yards along the bank, he said, when Natalie shrieked so loudly that he nearly fell in the river!
'I've got a wet foot!' she squealed, hopping up and down on one leg.
‘And do you know how much these trainers cost? They're from Marco Paglielli, in Bond Street!'
'You should have worn wellies like mine,' said Dave.
'They're from Cheapskate's Cut Price Warehouse in Glue Factory Lane.
Anyway, this looks like a good place, we'll sit here for a while and see what comes along.'
'Sit!?' exclaimed Natalie. 'In these trousers? They're Marcelle LeBlonk originals! Can you imagine what this wet grass will do to washed silk!?'